


i will wait, i will wait for that one thing

by zaplarry



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, Oblivious Liam, larry is real, mentions of perrie and sophia, pining!zayn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-21
Updated: 2015-08-21
Packaged: 2018-04-16 13:13:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4626537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zaplarry/pseuds/zaplarry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You love me?"</p><p> </p><p>Zayn couldn't answer, the lump in his throat felt too big to swallow. Liam knew the answer, he just wondered why Zayn waited all these years to finally tell him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i will wait, i will wait for that one thing

When Liam heard the news about Zayn and Perrie's breakup, he knew he had to call Zayn. They were going to be seeing each other in a week or so anyway for their reunion that Louis had planned, so he had to grow some balls and contact the boy. The only thing that made him nervous was that he wasn't sure of the way Zayn would react, hell, they hadn't seen each other for years. He didn't want Zayn to shut him out, but he didn't want to make it seem like he doesn't care. He always cared, even if he ceased to visit or contact him since the band broke up. 

That wasn't a fair judgement though, considering Liam hadn't contacted any of the boys since then. It didn't mean he stopped caring about them, sometimes he still felt 21 and still felt like they should be working their asses off and thanking fans on Twitter for winning them an award. They were always so good at that, Liam thinks. Liam always felt himself thinking about the old days, missing it. He didn't necessarily know why that was, probably because none of them really got any closure.

None of them hung out anymore for the exception of Louis and Harry, who are married and have three, four kids? Liam could never remember. Other than that, none of them have seen each other and Liam couldn't help but feel like he lost a big part of his life, because he had. As much stress and anger as it put on them, they cherished every single second and it hurt when they lost that. Liam wasn't ashamed to admit that he still did some creeping on Twitter, not that there was much to talk about.

He still checked his Twitter and read tweets from a long time ago, a lot of Liam apologizing for something that he did which offended someone unintentionally. He still checked the boys' Twitters sometimes, none of them were too active. They were only still active on Twitter for probably the first week following their breakup, just so the fans could still reach out if they wanted to. Liam remembered the first day like it was Yesterday, a bunch of fans in tears, tweeting them how much they loved him. Liam hated every minute, he wanted them to be happy.

Niall had packed his stuff up and moved back to Ireland after a few weeks, Louis and Harry moved further away and started thinking about marriage and kids, Zayn was nowhere to be found anyway considering he left the band prior, and Liam, he stayed right where he was and has been there since. Liam was the most emotional about it to say the least, or he was just the worst at hiding it. Niall wanted to get away from it all and not be constantly reminded of it, moving back home hadn't helped as much as Niall wanted it to. Liam rubbed his tired eyes, shaking the thoughts away. He didn't want the tears to start up again.

He shouldn't cry, hell, he should be fucking happy he's going to see his boys again in less than a week. Liam wondered if Sophia noticed he left the bed yet. Liam peeked back into the bedroom, finding out that she was still letting out soft snores. He gripped his phone tight in his hand, walking back to the sofa. A fidgety thumb hovered over  _Z.M._ , he couldn't figure out if he really wanted to go through with it.  _  
_

Out of a split second's worth of courage, he jabbed his thumb onto the screen and gasped as  _Dialing Z.M._ showed at the top. He became more nervous than he ever was before, his heart raced and his leg bobbed up and down. He thought for a moment if he should hang up before Zayn answered,  _if_ Zayn answered. He decided against it, knowing that he wouldn't be able to muster up enough courage to press  _call Z.M._ again. It rang for a few seconds, each making Liam more anxious.

He thought about hanging up again, he couldn't even decide against it before a tired voice said  _Hello?_ through the phone. Liam gasped, he hadn't heard that tired voice in so long. Liam only just then realized he hadn't pressed the phone up to his ear, as he did so, he still didn't know what to say. Zayn muttered another  _Hello?_ before Liam finally beginning to say something back. Not a  _hi_ , or a _Zayn_ , or even a  _oh my god_.

"Are you okay?" The words stumbled out before Liam could stop them. He momentarily forgot how to speak like a normal person. Liam's breath was quick and ragged, awaiting Zayn's response.

"Eh, Liam?" The fact that Zayn knew it was him after all these years tugged a heart string. He didn't think Zayn saved his number, maybe he had. Liam wanted to think Zayn just remembered him and maybe that was a bit delusional, but he didn't mind. "What are you doing? Isn't it like, really late over there?"

"Yeah, yeah. I just wanted to see how you're doing or if you need to talk to someone, like, I'm here." He heard Zayn sigh on the other line and a bit of his heart just broke off.

"That's nice of you, Liam. I'm okay, really. We're both good. It was kind of mutual if I'm honest. She took it really well, you know, said she expected it. Kinda surprised me, but..." He trailed off. Liam relaxed and Zayn relaxed and they both just let the conversation happen.

"Are you sure because, like, you guys have been together for such a long time. How long was it again?"

"It's been on and off for the last fourteen years, Liam. Really, I'm good. Kinda regret that we didn't do it sooner, you know? Wasted both of our time. She knew we weren't getting married after our fifth year." Liam nodded, stupidly realizing Zayn couldn't see him. He felt like Zayn was with him, like they were sitting and having a casual conversation. It felt almost normal. Why they were so comfortable, Liam didn't know.

"Fourteen years, man. Why'd you guys still stay together for nine more years if you knew you weren't getting married? Sorry to push, you don't have to answer." Liam mentally cursed himself out. If he were to get Zayn to shut him out, this would be the way to do it. By asking too many questions. 

"S'alright. Like I said, it's been on and off but we always considered ourselves engaged each time we got back together so technically like, we've been engaged all that time. I guess like, I dunno, she was everything I wanted, but it was still missing something. We kept it going on to like, find that?" Liam was surprised Zayn was being so open, especially to someone he hadn't seen in ten years and would probably consider more of an acquaintance now rather than a friend. Maybe Zayn had become more outgoing throughout the years, Liam thinks. That thought made him happy.

"But you never did?" 

"Right. Yeah, it was the same for her too, she felt the same way. But, yeah. It's good, we're good." 

"Are you guys still friends or?"

"Yeah, no. Definitely. We're still friends for sure." 

"Good, good. I just realized it's probably really early over there. Did I wake you?" Liam heard Zayn chuckle.

"Yeah, you did. S' alright though. S' around eight in the morning here." Liam blushed, he knew how much Zayn loved his sleep and that was way too early for Zayn Malik to be awake. Zayn being okay with Liam being an annoyance at eight in the morning after ten years of not speaking to each other, it made Liam's heart feel warm. Zayn usually doesn't have that kind of patience. 

"Do you think you're gonna go? You know, to the whole reunion thing?"

"Why? Aren't you gonna go?" Liam heard the nervousness in Zayn's voice, the boy was never good at hiding his emotions. He wore his heart on his sleeve for sure.

"Yeah, yeah. Probably. Be nice to get with all the boys again. Hear Niall's in London too. Should be fun." 

"Yeah, s'what I thought too." A grin broke its way onto Liam's face, he didn't know why. 

"Really miss you." Liam heard Zayn's little gasp on the other line even as he tried to cover it with a cough. 

"Miss you too, Li." Liam chewed his lip, waiting for Zayn to say something else. "You should get some sleep, Liam. S' late over there."

"Yeah, yeah. I'll see you next week." 

"Night, Leeyum." Liam fought back a smile.

"Night, Zayn." The two hung up and Liam felt arms come around him and a pair of lips on his cheek. 

"You talked to Zayn." Sophia muttered, hot breath on Liam's ear. 

"Yeah, yeah I did." 

"M' proud of you. Come back to bed though, babe. It's late." Liam nodded as Sophia pulled him along to their bedroom. 

 

* * *

 

 

The past few days had been killing Liam with anticipation, but today was the fucking day and he couldn't have been more thrilled. Louis contacted the boys in a group chat, texting some directions, a time and an address. Liam spent a lot of the day trying to figure out what to wear. He settled on a black sleeveless hoodie, a pair of jeans and his favorite pair of boots. When it came around three o' clock, Liam kissed Sophia goodbye and started up his car, following the directions very thoroughly but still somehow getting lost on the way. 

As he made his way to said address, Liam was sure he was the last to get there. He parked his car in the street as there was no room in the driveway, nervously slammed his door shut, briefly fixing his hair in the window. He took baby steps up the driveway and to the front door, knocking on it only to be greeted by Niall. Niall pulled Liam inside and hugged him, patting his back. Liam melted into it and hugged the boy back. 

"Mate, it's so great to see you after so long! How've you been? Whatcha been doing with your life?" Louis made his way into the room, tossing a towel back into the kitchen. Louis shoved Niall playfully out of the way, taking his turn to hug Liam which Niall ended up joining anyway. Niall was visibly very happy to be back with his boys, Liam couldn't say anything though because he felt the same. 

"Hey, how are you? Harry's just in the kitchen." 

"Cooking already?" 

"Just a few party pizzas, you're not that special." Louis said, fondly tapping Liam's nose and walking back into the kitchen. Niall grabbed Liam's wrist and led him into the kitchen excitedly. Liam hugged Harry, Niall joined in this one too. 

"Man, forgot how tall you are, mate." Harry chuckled, checking the oven again. "Nice house, you've proper taken care of yourself, lads." 

"I'm sure you have too," Louis said, leaning his bum on the back of a chair. "So, you married? Kids? Spill it all, need to hear it."

"Right as I walk in the door?" Louis chuckled, whipping Liam in the tummy with a towel.

"Hey! Behave yourself. Thirty-three years old and you still act like you're five." Louis smiled fondly as Harry resumed attending to the pizzas.

"If you keep opening the damn oven, they won't cook." Louis said, threatening to whip Harry with a towel as he waved it in the air. Niall was enjoying every minute of it.

"Been bantering like this since I got here." Niall mumbled into Liam's shoulder. Liam grinned and placed an arm around Niall.

"And what exactly do you know about cooking, Louis?" Harry turned to Louis, a brow raised and a hand on his hip.

"Almost nothing." 

"Exactly." 

"Still growing out the hair, I see?" Liam asked in the midst of all the banter.

"Yeah, I rather like this look on me. I've cut it though obviously, just a little bit. S' just at the shoulders, see?" Harry looked at his hair and made weird gestures to his shoulders. 

"I like it too," Louis said, walking over to Harry and placing a kiss to his arm. "Fun to pull." Louis ran his fingers through Harry's hair before he grabbed a tuft and tugged on it, surprising Harry. Harry whimpered and Louis rubbed the spot he just pulled, kissing Harry's chest. There was a knock on the door just then and Liam's heart fluttered, knowing who it was. Niall and Liam raced to the door before Louis could catch them. Niall opened the door, pulling a shocked Zayn into a hug.

Liam, Louis and Harry joined in, crowding around Zayn. A proper group hug just like they used to do on stage. Liam pushed those thoughts away, fearing the tears that threatened to escape his eyes. 

"Zayn! Welcome, man. Pizzas in the oven, games in the other room, let's go!" Louis and Zayn raced to the living room, starting up the game console. Harry watched for a little while before going back into the kitchen. Niall sat beside Zayn, cheering them on. Truthfully, he was confused as to what was happening but he was smiling nonetheless. Liam sat on the arm of the couch beside Louis, staring into space rather than watching the Telly. 

His gaze flicked to Zayn and stayed there. Zayn probably felt it because he returned the stare and gave Liam a quick smile before focusing back on the game only to realize he lost already. The boys joined Harry in the kitchen to get their food, Harry giving each of them their plates like the proper chef he is. They sat at the table together, Zayn not hesitating to sit by Liam, and they all genuinely felt very comfortable. This was home.

"Liam, you never answered my question." Louis stated matter-of-factly as he shoved a tiny slice of pizza into his mouth, visibly burning his tongue. Zayn looked over at Liam curiously, a fond glint in his eye.

"What question?" Liam asked, also eating some of his pizza. Zayn patted Liam's thigh gently before his focus turned back to his plate for a split second.

"Are you married?" Zayn's gaze flickered back to Liam, curious as to what the answer was.

"Eh, no. I'm not. I do have a girlfriend though. Sophia." Liam answered nervously, all eyes on him.

"Still dating her? Wow, good for you. I suggest you put a ring on it though." Louis' loud personality was not doing it for him at this moment, any other time he would be laughing and agreeing. But, marriage and children talk is what broke him and Sophia up in the first place. 

"Uh, actually..." Liam trailed off, not exactly knowing what to say or how to word it or if it would even be appropriate to say it.

"How long have you been dating her?" Zayn asked quietly from Liam's side.

"We actually broke up a little while after...you know," Everyone nodded simultaneously. "It was like, only four years ago that we got back together."

"So you actually haven't been dating that long then." 

"Why'd you break up?" Zayn asked. Liam felt a thick cloud of awkwardness between them, but he answered the question anyway.

"A lot of stress and like, she kept pushing marriage and kids because we finally had time for it. I was uncomfortable because we hadn't been dating that long -only two years- and that was serious, you know. A serious thing that she wanted. We spent some time apart and then we hung out again, went on dates again and stuff, so." Liam shut himself up before he could say anymore. Everyone was quiet and Liam focused on the pizza crust crumbs stuck to his plate. Niall got up and killed the silence, yelling and skipping to the sink as he put his plate in it. Everyone else followed suit. Louis led them all to the living room and they put a movie in, cuddling up on the couch.

Zayn sat by Liam on the end of the couch, Niall in the middle and Harry and Louis on the other side. They didn't really pay much attention to the film, they just sat and talked and sang a little like they did in Harry's stepdad's Bungalow so many years back. Zayn nudged his nose into Liam's shoulder whispering _Can I talk to you?_ , Liam nodded and Zayn took him upstairs and into Louis and Harry's bedroom. 

"What's up?" Liam asked, slightly confused as he sat on the bed. He didn't know why Zayn couldn't just talk to him downstairs, but he figured it must be pretty important if they had to be alone.

"With Sophia," Zayn started out, not even bothering to sit with Liam. "You said she wanted kids and stuff and you didn't want that. If that's what she wants and you don't, why are you together?" Zayn boldly asked.

"Well, I do want that. I just wasn't ready at the time and she kept pushing out when we were still so young and we only dated for two years. I didn't want that at the time. In general, I do want kids, of course I do." 

"Just not with her?" Liam was convinced Zayn was trying to get something specific out of him. What that was, Liam didn't know.

"Zayn, what are you talking about?" 

"If you don't want kids with her but you do want kids in general, that's obviously something to her personally. Something you don't want with her as a person. Why are you dating her then?" 

"You're not making any sense. I do want that, I just didn't then."

"Fuck, Liam. If you're just gonna let life pass you by, waiting for the right moments...like, it's not good for you. You're thirty-one years old and you aren't married, like, if you don't want that with her, find someone else." Okay, Zayn was making some sense. Liam was a middle-aged man who wasn't married and didn't have children. That was very questionable and Zayn was just concerned about him.

"Look, I know you're concerned about me and I appreciate that. I do, but you aren't married either and you're older than I am. What are you doing then? You wasted nine more years in a relationship you and your partner both knew was going absolutely nowhere. Now what does that say about you?" Liam cringed as he swore he heard a piece of Zayn's heart break. He saw it in Zayn's eyes, he was heartbroken.

"Liam, that was kind of dick thing to say." Zayn's gaze flicked to the floor and Liam stood up, hugging the smaller boy.

"I'm sorry. I know you're just looking out for me. That was rude, I'm sorry." Zayn shoved Liam off of him, causing Liam to land back on the bed.

"I'm not just fucking looking out for you! Don't you fucking get it?! All these years like, I thought we had a friendship like nobody else had! Like, when you boys broke up, I expected you to be the one person to fucking call me and tell me about it! Talk to me and not be afraid to just lay it all on me, just tell me how you feel. When I left the band, you were still there for me but when you guys broke up, you fucking treated me like I don't exist! Like you just disappeared off the face of the Earth, I don't fucking know." Zayn was angry, Liam knew. He was stumbling over his words, not really making any sense and not knowing what to say or how to get what he feels off his tongue in a way for Liam to just understand.

"I don't get it, Zayn. I didn't talk to the other boys either. Why are you so angry?"

"I thought you were better than that like, I thought even though you didn't talk to anyone else, you'd talk to me. I thought I was the special one." 

"Zayn, I've always cared. I never stopped caring about any of you."

"You still don't fucking get it." 

"No. No, I fucking don't." 

"I'm in love with you, you fucking idiot!" Just because of those words, Liam's world paused. All the memories of him and Zayn flashed through his mind. All the times he buried his face in Zayn's neck when they hugged, all the  _i love you_ 's, all the whispers, the time they fucking kissed for fuck's sake. How could he not have known? How could he have been so stupid, so oblivious, so blind? 

And all these years, Zayn waited for him. 

"You love me?"

Zayn couldn't answer, the lump in his throat felt too big to swallow. Liam knew the answer, he just wondered why Zayn waited all these years to finally tell him. Liam didn't think, he just grabbed Zayn by the neck, crashing their lips together. They fell back on the bed, Zayn on top of Liam. They stayed like that for a while.

How could have Liam been so stupid to not even realize his own feelings? This is what he was waiting for and he didn't even know it. Liam held Zayn for a while until they decided they should head back downstairs. Louis, Harry and Niall had all fallen asleep and Zayn and Liam decided they could just sleep in Louis and Harry's room. So they did.

 

* * *

 

 

The next morning was dreadful, everyone was heading back home. Niall had a flight to catch so he had to be at his hotel early in the morning to get his stuff together. When Liam and Zayn woke up in each other's arms, they took one look at each other and hugged each other closer. Liam placed a kiss to Zayn's temple, getting up and practically dragging him out of bed. Niall was at the kitchen table, drinking something warm in a mug. 

Louis and Harry were embracing by the sink. Niall gave Liam a warm smile as they walked in the room, Louis and Harry only noticing them when Zayn started digging through the fridge. Liam sat by Niall, placing his head on top of his arms on the table. Niall combed his fingers through Liam's hair, playing with little pieces before getting up and dunking the rest of his drink down the drain. 

"Well, lads, I better get going. Gotta flight to catch. Hadn't expected to stay the night." Louis hugged him first, then Harry, Zayn and Liam. Each hug lasted longer than a normal one would. Niall walked out the door after shouting  _i love you_ and the boys waved him off through the window. Louis opened it briefly to yell  _Have a safe trip!_ and then he closed it again. The boys had a small breakfast before Liam and Zayn were on their merry way. Liam told the boys that he loved them and hugged them all goodbye, sneaking a kiss to Zayn's nose. 

"Call me tonight?" Liam asked Zayn as he shut Louis and Harry's front door. Zayn blushed and nodded, kissing Liam's lips. Liam didn't hesitate to kiss back. They had a hard time parting but eventually they went their separate ways. When Liam finally got home, Sophia yelled at him. Screaming about how he didn't text her last night about saying the night and she was worried sick. Liam thought about ending it right there, but he didn't. 

Zayn called Liam as soon as he got home, they ended up staying on the phone for much longer than they expected. Liam didn't eat dinner. The next few days went on like that, they fought more. Sophia claiming that he "changed" but he didn't, she just never knew. But neither did he, really. 

Liam stayed the night at Zayn's and that was Sophia's last straw. She called him and ended things, kicking him out of the house in the process, which was no problem. Liam had Zayn. Zayn was always there. Zayn had always been there.

That's when it sunk in. Zayn had always been there, waiting for him. Even when Liam was oblivious and stupid and just ignorant, Zayn was there. This convinced Liam that Zayn would always be there.

That's all that Liam ever wanted. 

"You know when you said that you were looking for that one thing -no pun intended- and that's why you stayed with Perrie for so long?" Zayn nodded, combing his fingers through Liam's quiff. 

"Yeah?"

"Well, do I have that thing?" Zayn chuckled and it was music to Liam's ears.

"You've got more than that. I didn't even have to look for it, it was just right in front of me. Nobody else has what you have, babe." Liam tried to hide his blush by burying his face in Zayn's chest, causing Zayn to laugh. Liam snuggled into Zayn, trying to fall asleep. He sighed happily. This is what he was waiting for, this is the closure he wanted. This was home. 

Liam fell asleep to Zayn's soft angelic voice singing the tune of  _Earned It_. Liam thinks there is nowhere else he'd rather be. 

 

_You make it look like it's magic_

_'Cause I see nobody, nobody but you you you_

_I'm never confused hey hey_

_I'm so used to being used_

_So I love when you call unexpected_

_'Cause I hate when the moment's expected_

_So I'ma care for you you you_

_I'ma care for you you you yeah_

_'Cause boy you're perfect_

_You're always worth it_

_And you deserve it_

_The way you work it_

_'Cause boy you earned it_

_Boy you earned it_

 


End file.
